Getting strong letters of recommendation requires strategic planning that begins well before application season. The key is building genuine relationships with teachers who can speak authentically about your student’s intellectual engagement, growth, and classroom contributions—not just their grades. Students should request LORs from junior year teachers in the spring, ask in person, and provide organized materials that help teachers write detailed, compelling letters.
For the more selective colleges, letters of recommendation can be as important as essays or interviews because they provide third-party validation of a student’s academic character. For a complete overview of maximizing your student’s college application, see our Top-Tier College Application Tips to Maximize Chances.
Which Teachers Should My Student Ask for Letters of Recommendation?
Your student should ask teachers from junior year classes who know them well and can tell compelling stories about their academic growth. The best LOR writers are teachers who have witnessed your student’s engagement, intellectual curiosity, and contributions to the classroom—not necessarily the teachers who gave them the highest grades.
According to veteran college admissions expert Jamie Berger, “The answer is to be an engaged, active, committed student in your junior year classes. Come early or stay late. Chat with your teacher, but not superficially—find out what really intrigues you and engage them.”
At Great College Advice, we advise both recommendations to come from core academic subjects (English, math, science, social studies, or foreign language), with one STEM and one non-STEM teacher when possible. Exceptions may apply for students with specific academic interests, such as a film major asking their film teacher.
Consider which teachers could speak to your student’s qualities as:
- The Intellectually Curious: Does your student ask insightful questions and research topics beyond what’s required?
- The Helper: Does your student support classmates and explain concepts to others?
- The Leader: Does your student take initiative on group projects while bringing out the best in teammates?
- The Most Improved: Has your student overcome challenges and demonstrated growth?
A teacher who can speak to these qualities will write a far more compelling letter than one who simply confirms good grades.
When Is the Best Time to Request Letters of Recommendation for College?
The best time to request letters of recommendation is in the spring of junior year, ideally before the school year ends. This gives teachers time to write thoughtful letters when your student’s classroom presence is still fresh in their minds.
As Jamie explains: “One of the most important ways to get a good letter of recommendation is to ask early and ask in person. You don’t want to be hitting the teachers when they’re done with this stuff—hit them spring of junior year, before the school year ends.”
Teachers write dozens of recommendation letters each year. Those who are asked early—when they aren’t overwhelmed with requests—will have more time and mental energy to craft detailed, personalized letters. Ideally, students should ask for LORs by the end of the junior year. Also, they should make sure to inform their LOR writers of their application deadlines at least one month in advance.
Practical timeline:
- Spring of junior year: Make the initial ask in person
- End of junior year: Provide the information folder
- One month before deadlines: Send a friendly reminder with the deadline dates
- After submission: Write handwritten thank-you notes.
How Can My Student Build Stronger Relationships with Teachers Before Requesting LORs?
Building relationships with teachers requires genuine engagement throughout the school year, not just when recommendation season arrives. This is one of the highest-ROI investments your student can make in their college application.
Jamie advises: “Figure out who your favorite two teachers are and dig in deep and participate more in class and help them. Get to know them, and they will help you.”
Practical strategies include:
- Arriving early or staying late to discuss class content
- Asking thoughtful questions during lessons
- Volunteering for challenging projects
- Showing interest in the teacher’s area of expertise
- Contributing meaningfully to class discussions
- Helping struggling classmates understand the material
Students should remember that being a great student means more than just earning an A. Jamie emphasizes: “Getting an A isn’t enough. If you’re a stone-faced stoic kid who never speaks in class, you’re not going to ingratiate yourself with your teacher.”
The students who receive the strongest letters are those who demonstrate intellectual curiosity, help classmates, and contribute meaningfully to class discussions—precisely the qualities admissions officers most want to hear about.
What Information Should My Student Provide Teachers to Help Them Write a Strong Letter?
After a teacher agrees to write a letter, your student should provide a well-organized folder containing key materials that will help the teacher craft a detailed, compelling recommendation.
The teacher’s information folder should include:
- The student’s resume highlighting activities and achievements
- The personal statement (if completed)
- A short statement of purpose explaining college goals and why specific schools are a good fit
- A complete list of colleges with application deadlines clearly stated
- Any required recommendation forms
- Contact information for follow-up questions
- A short note of personal thanks.
At many schools, students can also complete a “brag sheet”—a document sharing personal details, accomplishments, and stories the teacher might not know. As Jamie explains: “Maybe you’re at a huge school, and you can’t get to know them. You prepare a brag sheet, so the teacher knows some more facts about you to write about.”
Parents play an important role, too. Fill out any parent questionnaires that are required by your student’s high school. Counselors and teachers will often use the stories or comments parents write in these questionnaires to write an LOR.
The more specific details you provide, the more vivid and personalized the recommendation will be.
Should My Student Waive the Right to See Their Letters of Recommendation?
Yes, your student should definitely waive their right to see their letters of recommendation.
Many applications, including the Common App, ask students to make this choice. Waiving the right to see LORs gives the letters more credibility because admissions officers trust that teachers are being candid when they know the student won’t see what’s written.
Your student definitely should waive this right, as colleges will regard letters differently if they believe the student has seen them prior to the submission of the applications.
Sometimes teachers will share their letters after all applications are submitted—this is fine to accept if offered. However, if a teacher doesn’t volunteer to share, your student should not ask to see it. Parents should also refrain from requesting to see the letters.
A confidential letter allows teachers to provide nuanced assessments, including constructive observations about a student’s growth areas, which often make letters more believable and compelling to admissions committees.
How Do Colleges Actually Use Letters of Recommendation in Admissions Decisions?
Understanding how admissions offices evaluate LORs helps you make strategic decisions about which teachers to ask and how much time to invest in these relationships.
According to Jamie: “In general, the smaller a school, the more the essays and the letters of recommendation matter because the more time staff has to actually read them in depth. Big state universities are going to be more based on your data, your grades, and your scores. Small honors colleges within those schools will read your essays more and read the letters more carefully.”
What’s in a letter of recommendation?
Letters contain two key components that admissions officers evaluate:
- Narrative account: A description of the student’s abilities, attitude, and specific achievements in the classroom
- Checkbox ratings: Teachers compare the student against their peer group—and against all students they’ve ever taught—on multiple criteria
Teachers typically complete rating criteria, which “give a very clear picture of the academic performance and potential of the student.”
Critically, Jamie warns: “Even the big schools that don’t read them that carefully, a negative letter they will notice—or a letter that hints at negativity they will notice.”
This is why choosing the right recommenders and building genuine relationships is so essential.
What If a Teacher Declines My Student’s Request for a Letter of Recommendation?
If a teacher declines to write a letter of recommendation, your student should accept the decision gracefully and move on to another teacher. While this rarely happens when students thoughtfully choose their recommenders, it’s actually a blessing in disguise.
According to the Great College Advice Family Handbook, “If it does, it’s probably for the best, because that person likely would not have written a strong letter for your student. Encourage your student to talk to their counselor about alternative LOR-writers.”
Teachers typically decline for legitimate reasons:
- They may be overcommitted to other requests
- They may not feel they know the student well enough
- They may not feel they can write a genuinely strong letter
A lukewarm or negative letter can seriously damage an application. Jamie emphasizes: “If you’ve been a good student in their class, they probably won’t say no—and part of their job is to write those letters.”
If your student is consistently being turned down, this is a signal to reevaluate their classroom engagement and teacher relationships. The rejection is also a valuable data point about how well your student has cultivated meaningful academic relationships.
Important Notes About VIP Recommendations
Parents often ask whether a prestigious connection—a senator, prominent alumnus, or elected official—should write a letter for their student. The advice from admissions experts is clear: unless that person knows your student well, such letters rarely help and often backfire.
In fact, most VIP recommendations backfire. The adage in the admissions world is, ‘the thicker the file, the thicker the kid.’
Admissions officers want to know first and foremost about your student’s life in the classroom. A letter from someone who barely knows your student—no matter how impressive their title—will not provide the authentic insights that make applications compelling.
The Bottom Line: ROI-Focused Approach to Letters of Recommendation
For practical parents focused on value and outcomes, letters of recommendation represent one of the highest-ROI elements of the college application. Unlike test scores or GPA, which are largely fixed by senior year, the LOR strategy can be optimized with thoughtful planning:
- Start early: Genuine relationship-building in junior year pays dividends
- Choose strategically: Pick teachers who know your student’s character, not just their grade
- Ask in person: Spring of junior year, with respect and genuine appreciation
- Prepare thoroughly: Provide organized materials that make the teacher’s job easier
- Waive rights: Confidential letters carry more weight
- Follow up graciously: Thank-you notes strengthen lasting relationships
For selective colleges, especially, strong letters of recommendation can be the differentiator that helps your student stand out in a competitive applicant pool.
Need Expert Help with Letters of Recommendation and College Applications?
The expert admissions counselors at Great College Advice can help your family develop an effective LOR strategy, guide teacher selection, and ensure every element of your student’s application works together to present the strongest possible candidacy. Contact us today for your complimentary consultation.
